The Restlessness of the blank page

Whenever I set about to write a blog, I always struggle with starting it.  I have a difficult time even knowing where to go with my ideas, if I have any ideas at all.  As I sit staring at a blank computer screen it often feels rather daunting.  Since starting this devotion for lent, I've had moments where the words flow naturally and other times where they come at a crawl and it sometimes takes several sittings and the span of a couple days to simply write what I want to say.  Indeed, there is a restlessness of the blank page.  I felt I should write about this today, because it goes beyond simply writing and simply trying to come up with something worthwhile to say.  Each of us have written a story with our lives.  Some of us have quite a few chapters written and are now working on the resolution of our story, others are still only a few chapters in and still developing the main character, but all of us have before us a blank page.  That blank page is what happens next.  It begs the question what will you make of your life and the world you live in.

Elie Wiesel said that "God made man because he loves stories."  I love this quote as it points out that God is indeed with us at every step of our story.  He is eager to see how we will live our lives and what we will do with the gifts he has given us.  Not that he doesn't have the power to see how we will live.  Indeed he knows how we will choose to live, but he nonetheless is eager to see our reactions and experiences them with us.  When we take those steps of courage we create new stories and new exciting parts that will surely be read and re-read.  I imagine that when we get to heaven, we will laugh and cry as we recount these instances with God.

I know of several people right now who are feeling restlessness before the blank page.  Some are unsure of job prospects, others have uncertainties at work, and still others are embarking on new adventures that will undoubtedly bring changes to their life.  Yet, I am also encouraged by their fortitude and their dependence on God.  One of those passages that really gets to the heart of this is the beginning of Joshua.  The book of Joshua opens up by announcing that Moses has died and that Joshua is to lead the Israelites to the promised land.  God speaks to Joshua and commands him to be strong and courageous and to meditate on the law day and night so that he will not turn from it.  As in another blog post earlier this week there is a great unknown in front of him.  And there is a great deal of uncertainty as to what will happen next.  Yet God is aware of what will happen and where he is to go.  He gives Joshua instructions and promises to be with him.  Joshua leans heavily on that promise and begins writing an amazing story of the conquest of Canaan and the beginning of the nation of Israel.

God calls us to look at the blank pages of our lives as being opportunities for grand adventures.  As we continue to go forth in our stories we must be fully dependent on God and to meditate on his words.  Indeed, many times I am most anxious about writing when I haven't spent time with Him or when I haven't been diligent in examining his word.  It is those times where I am trying to write on my own power and not relying on him.  The beautiful about this exercise is the fact that it forces me to sit before him before I am able to write having already exhausted much of the content that I can come up with on my own.  It is only when I am truly leaning on Christ and his power that I am able to move forward in confidence both in writing and in life.  Our lives are great stories before God with blank pages ahead.  May we not approach them with trepidation but rather with excited and adventurous hearts.  May we be spurred on by the blank page.