Friday, February 24, 2012

Exhausting heaven's resources

During my Old Testament class last week we were talking about David and his infidelity with Bathsheba.  My professor got to talking about Nathan's rebuke of David.  Nathan is delivering this message from God telling David that God has given him his house, his wives, and all of Israel and Judah, but then he goes on from there and says, "And if this had been too little, I would have given you even more." (2 Samuel 12:8)  It seems that God is disappointed that David hasn't appreciated the gifts that he has been given.  My professor began to break away from our original topic and focused in on this one point.  From a personal standpoint, my professor believed that despite all of his infirmities and illnesses that he has had to deal with over his life, that God was ready at a moment's notice to exhaust heaven of its resources to bless him.  Such a powerful illustration of God's desire to give good gifts to His children.  God wants to bless me more than I can possibly know or understand.  Then he took it one step further and claimed that God already has blessed us beyond our imaginations.  He imagined having a conversation with God about the things that God had given him during his life and just hearing God say that the things that were given to him were perfect for him, that God had taken great pains to find the perfect gifts suitable for him, and that no other gift would do.  That all of heaven had worked together to find the perfect gift for him.

I really thought about all of this for quite a while.  The thing is that I was wrestling with the possibility that God was calling me away from my home church.  After becoming more and more involved in my church lately, I couldn't understand God asking me to move on.  This discussion really made me stop and think.  God knows the perfect gift for me and is constantly seeking to give it to me.  His plan for my life is far better than the one that I have planned.  He knows me far better than I know myself and is able to bless me in a way that far surpasses that which I could even hope for.  So if God called me away, then who was I to say no.  It certainly wasn't an easy place to be in and clouded my path substantially, but something in me said to simply hold to God and know that He has a plan better than mine.  To my delight, I later found out that God was not calling me away from the church, but had opened up new opportunities for me within the church.  It appears that God simply wanted me to acknowledge that it is His plan that we are following and not mine.

There is the age-old expression that the grass is always greener on the other side.  We say it tongue and cheek knowing that if we go to the other side we'll find that it really isn't better than before and in some cases its much worse.  We look at the things we have and become discontent and think that something else is better for us.  If we simply stop and think about it though the things we have are far better than what we realize.  They are gifts granted to us by God for the sole purpose of blessing us.  They were carefully selected to fit who we are and who we were made to be.  If we can stop looking over the fence, perhaps we can begin to marvel at how amazing the gifts are that God has already blessed us with.  My hope is that as we continue to look at our lives, we will begin to see just how perfect are God's blessings.  That we will begin to appreciate in a new light the people in our lives, the abilities that we have, and the opportunities that God has blessed us with.  May we realize that God continues to exhaust heaven's resources from a desire to display His incredible love.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Please sir, I want some more

The now famous line from Charles Dickens' Oliver Twist has become the cry of the American nation.  We seem to resonate with young Oliver who stands up and simply says, "Please sir, I want some more."  Unfortunately, in most cases we bear little resemblance to the hunger burdened Oliver.  Instead we are plagued by our insatiable consumerism and want for more.  Over the last several decades, consumerism has risen to alarming levels and in many cases has driven people into financial disaster.  The rampant spending habits of our culture is fueled by this constant desire for more, but where does it come from?

Now the obvious answer could of course be that our culture has imposed on us this buy-more mentality, but I think that this has only added to the already existing condition.  I have seen hints of this desire in my trips to poverty stricken Ethiopia.  After giving away things to the children there, there is often a communicated desire for more.  I think that this desire for more is something that is part of what it means to be human.  Or more accurately, the desire for more is the soul's awareness that something is missing.

If we go back to Genesis, we see that Adam was made in the very image of God.  Just imagine that.  Adam is made in the image of God!  Not only that, but he has this intimacy with God that is incredible.  He actually walks in the Garden with God.  Communicates with him face to face.  Adam doesn't desire anything else.  It is God who acknowledges that man needs something else, so He creates Eve.  After the fall, we see this immediate desire for more through the story of Cain and Abel.  This desire for more permeates the rest of human history.  We see it in the reign of Solomon and how eventually he fell into idol worship because of his desire for more gold and wives.  We see it in the conquests of empires and kings.  Then we see one man confront this desire for more and offers us a solution.  He calls it the "living water."

One of the most poignant moments in the ministry of Jesus is the conversation that He has with the Samaritan woman at the well.  He discusses this idea of the living water and that if you drink of it you will never thirst again.  Here is this idea of our need for more.  No matter how much water this Samaritan woman takes from the well, she will need to go back another time to get more.  She can't draw enough to satisfy her for the rest of her life, yet Jesus speaks of a water that does exactly that.  He is of course referring to himself here.  This is what I'm trying to get at.  The desire for more is really the desire for more of God.  Whenever we attempt to fill our desires with something else, it always leaves us wanting.  It can't satisfy because our soul knows what were made to be, that is the image of God.  Our soul tells us that we simply aren't satisfied and so we want more.  The amazing and joyful thing is that when we desire more of God, God grants that desire and continues to grant it.  Our soul rejoices in finding that which truly satisfies and freely drinks of it.  This constant filling up of our soul through God is what we were made for.  Let our desire for more be correctly oriented towards that which our soul truly craves.  May we look to God and merely ask for more of Him.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Galileo was Wrong!

Long ago, many people believed that the sun and all the planets revolved around the Earth.  After many calculations and observations, however, the famous physicist and astronomer Galileo Galilei determined that the Earth in fact revolves around the Sun.  This idea of course has been accepted as fact for quite a long time, but I offer new evidence that this in fact false.  Yes that's right, the Earth does not revolve around the Sun, but rather around me... Or at least that is what my actions and behavior would suggest.

Okay so I don't actually believe that the Earth revolves around me, but the way I act sometimes would suggest otherwise.  These actions may be subtle to the point that I don't even notice them.  In fact, just yesterday I had to correct my selfish behavior over something that was rather trivial.  I was driving back to school and had to make a few stops along the way.  As I pulled into the bank to drop off a check, three other cars pulled in in front of me.  I couldn't believe that 3 other people would need to stop at the bank at the exact time that I was.  I finished at the bank and noticed that I was beginning to run a bit later than I had expected.  I started to get onto Rt. 30 when I realized that I had gotten Rt. 30 West rather than Rt. 30 East.  Clearly the city planning hadn't consulted me on where best to put the ramp.  Finally getting closer to Lancaster I got onto 501 behind slow moving cars.  Didn't they know I was in a hurry?  I was sure they were moving slowly on purpose.  Of course the traffic lights were all red, in their attempts to delay me.  Stopping at Giant I picked up some snacks (I was in charge of bringing snacks to the class that I was beginning to run late for) and realized that the person who stocked the shelves hadn't put everything in one nice spot for me.  Upon leaving the parking lot however, a car who clearly had the right away let me go in front of them.  It was at that point that I realized how selfish I had been up to that point during the day.  I hadn't stopped to consider other people.  My entire morning had been all about me and what I needed.

A couple weeks ago I had the opportunity to spend the entire day in silence and solitude before God.  Something that kept coming up was my selfishness.  I began tracing back over my life and began seeing subtle traces of being self-centered.  Even in serving, I have tendencies of honoring myself over others.  Things as simple as picking up my bag from a car full of luggage before helping others with theirs. It was a hard thing to wrestle with especially since the vast majority of the things I do, I don't even realize I'm doing them.  I would wager that this problem of selfishness is not unique to myself.

The idea of selfishness is entirely contrary to the bible.  Jesus was the antithesis of selfishness.  Everything He did was for the glory of God.  He always looked out for the well-being of others and constantly sought to encourage those He came into contact with.  He even demonstrated this others-centered life by laying down His for the world.  In His beautiful statement from John 15 He discusses what it really means to be unselfish.  He says, "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13).  To be so concerned with other people that you are willing to lay down your life for them is the true sense of love.  This doesn't just refer to dying on a cross for your friends, but to die to your needs and wants for your friends.  This is what it really means to die to yourself.  To be able to put others' needs and desires above your own on a moment by moment basis is to truly die to yourself.

Recently I've been doing a lot of self-examination and analyzing why I do certain things and not others.  It has been a great time of learning yet has certainly led to some challenging growth opportunities.  Having established that I am a selfish person, I have begun to realize the gravity of what that means.  It has forced me to be more intentional about my actions and more thoughtful in how I help others.  By always grounding my thoughts and actions in Christ, I am able to have small victories over my selfish nature and my desire to be in control.  While I have certainly gained some valuable insights into my character and have made small victories over my selfishness, there are still times when my actions demonstrate a belief that Galileo was wrong.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Counting the Cost Part 2

Last week I talked about the movie "Money Ball" and counting the cost.  I kind of want to add to that post this week.  A few weeks ago I read the beginning of 1 Samuel and I read the story of Hannah.  Now I've read it before and have always appreciated it, but something in this reading just struck me differently.  Hannah was married to Elkanah who had another wife named Peninnah.  From the text we see that Peninnah has many children, but Hannah is barren.  In that culture, it is a huge disgrace to be unable to have children and Hannah was often the target of ridicule from Peninnah.  She was so heartbroken over this that it says "...(she) wept and would not eat."  There was nothing she desired more than to have a son.  Hannah is so distressed at one point that Eli, the high priest, thinks she is drunk.  She responds to him saying, "I am a woman troubled in spirit.... I have been pouring out my soul before the Lord.  Do not regard your servant as a worthless woman, for all along I have been speaking out of my great anxiety and vexation."  Of course Eli realizes he has put his foot in his mouth and blesses her and encourages her that God will grant the petition.

The fascinating and startling thing here is that Hannah, in her prayer, told God that if He gave her a son, she would give him back to the Lord to be used in the Lord's service.  Isn't this incredible.  Here is a woman who has endured ridicule and condemnation for not having a child.  She has been in a deep state of depression over this one thing and she tells God now that if she is blessed with it she will give it back to God.  This is real sacrifice.  It isn't just the scraps of the table being sacrificed to God here, it is the very thing that she desires most.

Now you may say that God is going to provide her with sons and daughters later for her sacrifice.  This may be true however, from her standpoint, there is no guarantee for that.  Even Elkanah seems a little skeptical that God will give her another son afterwards.  She tells him that she is going to wean the boy and then take him up to the temple and he responds with, "Do what seems best to you."  Hannah doesn't know if God will give her any other sons, but to have Samuel and to be able to offer him up to the Lord is enough for her.  The cost to follow God ended up being the very thing she desired most.  Not only did she count the cost, but she was joyful in offering it as shown by the praise filled prayer she prays after giving Samuel to Eli.

So what do we do with this?  There is a song that I really like called "I will follow" by Chris Tomlin.  The chorus of the song says:

Where you go I'll go
Where you stay I'll stay
When you move I'll move
I will follow you
Who you love I'll love
How you serve, I'll serve
If this life I lose, I will follow you
I will follow you

I think Chris Tomlin hits in on the nail here.  Whatever God does, whatever he asks us to do, we should follow, even if it costs us everything.  Being that full of hope and faith is what our hearts should be.  Too often I notice in myself that if the cost is more than I am comfortable with I back away.  I follow God right up until it becomes inconvenient for myself.  I want a faith and hope that can say, "If this life I lose, I will follow you."  After counting the cost, I want to be able to pay it joyfully.  

I think many of us are in the same boat.  If we take an honest look at our faith we say that we follow God, but not to this degree.  Yet at the very same time, we watch movies like "Money Ball" and something in us stirs saying that's the kind of faith I want.  Something tugs at us when we see someone sacrifice everything.  When Frodo and Sam, in "The Lord of the Rings," believe that they won't be returning home they continue on faithfully and the audience watches in admiration.  Movies like this demonstrate our society's desire to be courageous and lay it all on the line for something greater than ourselves.  Our hearts desire it, but our flesh is weak.  May we learn to count the cost and offer it jubilantly.