Thursday, November 22, 2012

I want to see

I was recently reading the passage of Blind Bartimaeus (Mark 10:46-52) again and I was encouraged to put myself in the shoes of Bartimaeus.  I was moved by this experience and felt that I should share it.  My hope is that you find it useful in drawing near to God.

I've heard his name before and his reputation as a healer and teacher, yet I have never met him.  Day after day, I sit by the gate hoping that he'll pass by.  Then one day, I hear his name whispered.  A great crowd is passing by, I begin to shout, "Son of David, have mercy on me."  Some laugh, others tell me to be quiet.  I don't care.  I shout all the louder.  I hear his voice for the first time.  He is calling to me.  My heart leaps.  I've dreamt about this for months.  Could it be that my time has finally come?  I can feel my heart beating in my chest.  I spring to my feet and start sprinting toward the sound of his voice.  I can't see where I'm going and I run into someone and fall to the ground.  The laughter around me is drowned out by the sound of my own heartbeat.  I hear his voice calling me to him again.  I continue to run towards him.  I know that there are rocks in my path and I stumble over a couple of them.  As I begin to fall, I feel two strong arms catching me.  It is him!  He is holding me.  I feel his embrace, its full of strength and grace.  He calmly lifts me to my feet and holding me close he whispers, "What do you want me to do for you?"  My mind races.  What do I want him to do for me?  I've dreamt about this moment for so long and yet now that I'm here there are so many things that I desire.  Being able to leave the beggar's life, to be free of shame and guilt, to have the ability to avoid rocks in my path, to no longer have the condemnation of others, or being entirely dependent on others, or to have friends and a family of my own.  Yet now in this moment, all I can think about is the majesty before me.  Even in my blindness, I behold a splendor beyond comprehension.  Oh to see that splendor undimmed by my lack of sight.  Oh to view it, even if just for a moment.  Certainly this is what my heart aches for.  This is what I have longed for for so long.  "Lord," I respond, "I want to see."

Saturday, November 17, 2012

What's your story?

The other day I was talking with my mentor and we got on the topic of preaching.  He told me a story about this time that he preached and had given this incredible talk on theological truths and the deep need for Jesus in our lives and then ended with a story from his personal life that helped to illuminate those truths.  Following his talk, the people came to him and commented on the story far more than the truths that he had talked about.  The lesson I was to learn here was that stories are always easier to remember and that if they help your talk, they should be included.

Stories really are fascinating.  We are entranced by them and often get caught up in the plot, eventually becoming part of it.  Many who know me, know that I have an extensive DVD collection.  I also have the ability to see a small scene of a movie and know exactly what movie it is, what its about, and how this particular scene will add to the movie.  The reason why is because each part of a good story adds to the story as a whole.  If you take out the beginning, the story doesn't make sense.  If you take out the middle, you're left confused and wondering how you got to the end.  If you take the end away,  well... you have the makings of a great series... to the chagrin of those in the audience who need some form of closure.

It's interesting though, because as great as my memory is in remembering scenes from movies, I often have the hardest time remembering names of people that I've met.  Sure I can make the argument that I'm simply bad with names, but is that really the reason that I don't remember their names?  I don't think it is.  You see each person lives a story, whatever that may be.  Just as a good movie requires each piece to be integrated to the overall idea of the story so too does each detail of your life.  Whenever you meet someone, your interaction with that person becomes integrated into part of your story, but the person does not necessarily become a part of it.  You have to choose to allow them to be part of your story.  A case in point.  I've been going to the same church for years.  There are many people that I've seen plenty of times, to the point that I say hi in the halls and occasionally ask them how they're doing.  The problem is that I can't remember their name.  I know I've been told it before, and that I've heard it several times, but I've never deemed it important enough to remember, because I haven't deemed them worthy to be part of my story.  Why is that?

I think its because we are generally afraid to be vulnerable with others.  We know that if we allow someone to be part of our lives and therefore part of our story, then they have the ability to change our story for good or ill.  By allowing someone to be part of my story, I give them the ability to hurt me deeply.  I give them the power to speak into my life and make changes, changes that I may not enjoy.  By allowing someone to enter into my story, I give up part of my control.  Yet this is exactly what we are called to.  We are called to bring people into our lives.  Hear me out here, I'm not talking about becoming an extrovert.  In fact, extroverts are just as guilty of this as introverts.  We need to break through the superficiality that has become commonplace in our relationships.  If we are able to invite others into our story then we are given the privilege of speaking into theirs.  We need to follow the example of Jesus who stepped down into our story and offered us a new one.  We are given this same opportunity when we enter the story of others and have the chance to have their story shape our own.  May we have the boldness to ask, "What's your story?"