Drink, Drink.

Drink, Drink!  I've heard it a number of times throughout the day.  During my trip in fact, I've heard it so many times that it has become similar to a pavlovian response mechanism.  I hear the word drink and I reach for my water bottle.  Everywhere we go, we begin to realize that water is a precious commodity.  The abundance of water in the US has made me complacent and it has become yet another thing I take for granted.  Now I've been in other areas where water is important, but normally that's because it isn't safe to drink from the tap.  The water here is safe to drink, there just isn't much of it available.  Conserving water is a must and pursuing it is a necessity.  The spiritual parallel of this is not lost on me.

Isaiah 35 talks about the fact that blind will see, but it also says that "waters will break forth in the wilderness and streams in the desert."  All of these are said in relation to Jesus and the work that he did and will do.  Having seen the wilderness, it is absolutely stunning, but there is no water to be found.  It is dry and hot and the hills and mountains block the rain from making it to this area.

How many times have I found myself in the wilderness?  How many times have I been searching and looking for God's provision, but only to find nothing but rocks and dirt?  It seems to happen frequently and I'm often left spiritually dehydrated repeating the psalmist, "my soul thirsts and even faints for you."

There is another side to this, however.  After hearing those words "drink, drink" we all made our way into Hezekiah's tunnel.  It was built during the invasion of Sennacherib who was trying to seize Jerusalem.  Hezekiah realizing that his water source was outside the wall dug a tunnel from the Gihon Spring to inside the walls of Jerusalem.  The tunnel is 1/3 a mile long and cuts through the bedrock.  The diggers dug from both ends and met somewhere in the middle.  It is an absolutely remarkable story and to this day, nobody is entirely sure how they were able to do it.  One thing is certain, however,  Hezekiah and the men of Israel went to extreme measures to have a source of water closer to them.  I think there is much to learn from this.  So often I am stuck in that wilderness and almost wallowing in my position.  Despite feeling the dryness of the wilderness or the groanings of my own soul, my efforts in pursuing the Living Water are meager at best.  May we begin to listen to our soul's longings.  May we recognize our great need for the Living Water.  May we listen to His voice when he says, "Drink.  Drink."

Great Expectations

I sit here on the first leg of my journey.  I have dreamed about making this trip for years and for the last several months this dream has been at the edge of the horizon slowly coming into view.  I'm filled with emotions of many kinds.  From soul-bursting excitement to anxiety and uncertainty. It is difficult for me to comprehend the fact that at the end of this journey I will be in the land where God chose a people to be a blessing to all nations.  A land where that same people struggled with what it meant to be a blessing and frequently failed to deliver upon it.  The land where God himself came down to us, where he walked among us.  It is the land where my Savior lived and breathed and where he drew his last.  More gloriously, it is the land where he defeated death and rose again beginning the work of making all things new.  This is the land today known as the Holy Land, the land of Israel.

As I wait for the train to leave the station, I allow my mind to wander and wonder.  I begin to dream of what it will be like when the dust of the Judaen wilderness blows over my sandals.  Will I gaze out over the barrenness and feel the loneliness of the shepherd's life?  Will I recall the temptations of Jesus and recognize those same temptations in my own life?  What will it be like to stand on the shores of the Sea of Galilee and imagine what the disciples felt as they saw Jesus coming to them?  I feel like Joshua on the edge of the promised land.  I'm looking out over the land that I have been working towards, the land that I have dreamt about in my wanderings and now the rush of excitement mixes with a twinge of fear.  The dreaming has left me with great expectations.  What if it fails to measure up?  What if I miss out on what God wants for me on this trip due to my own preoccupations with life?  Then the other 'what if' questions begin to enter into my mind.  What if I miss my flight?  What if my luggage gets lost?  What if... What if...  Life seems to be filled with 'what if's.

I find that my journey to Israel parallels the rest of the story I find myself in.  After wandering for so long in trying to find God's desire for me, I am quickly approaching graduation.  In a few short months I will be finishing up seminary and looking to do what I was created for.  It has the same feelings of excitement and uncertainty that I now face going to Israel.  The same great expectations linger in my head.  The same 'what if' questions dance around in my thoughts.  What if being a pastor isn't what I imagine it to be?  After all, I've built it up so much, how it could it possibly measure up?  I wonder if I have been in error in allowing these expectations and dreams to fester.  If somehow I have already set myself up for disappointment.  A part of me seems to be saying to do away with these expectations so I won't be disappointed or discouraged.  Yet there is something else, some part of me hears a whisper that gently reassures me and says "Dare to dream big, and see if I'm not more than all you've ever dreamed."  When we are on the verge of all we've known and are about to embark on a journey into the untamed wilderness of the unknown, it is there that God says "I am with you."  May we never forget that and may we continue to dream big.

The heart of God, a mother's heart.

Today is mother's day.  It is the one day of the year that we set aside to take a moment and simply honor our mothers and reflect on what they have done for us.  I realize this is a painful day for some as their own mother acted anything but motherly towards them.  To you, I extend my deepest condolences, for I do not know where I would be had I had a mother like that.  I do not want to discount your experience, but today I also want to honor my own mother personally and to express the deep joy I have that she is my mother.

Every year, I get my mom a mother's day card and I write in it and tell her how much I have appreciated her and that I would not be the man I am today if it had not been for her guiding influence.  Indeed, this is true, but sometimes I wonder if I'm not being self-centered in this.  You see, it seems to suggest that I am only grateful for those things that she has done for me and the impact that she has had on me.  Furthermore, by identifying only those things, I fail to acknowledge the many things that she does that go unnoticed or may not have a direct influence on my life.  When I do this, I equate her worth by what she's done for me and this would be my among my greatest failures for my mom is far greater than the things she has done for me or the influence she has had.  For all of these things only hint at the underlying truth and that is that my mother's heart reflects well the heart of God.


Indeed, I have watched as my mom has been slow to anger even as I find myself to be the primary culprit that incites that anger.  In this, she displays Christ's love for his enemies and the fact that while sinners he came to us.  She has demonstrated incredible humility when others have attempted to place her on a pedestal, that she rightfully deserved.  She has spoken truth to those who were in need of it and has forgiven even when it was painful.  She has been right outside the spotlight cheering others on as we have chased our dreams.  Reflecting back it is clear that it is only by her example that we ever had a hope of attaining them.  It is this selfless love that she gives freely and unconditionally.  Certainly, I am thankful for my mother, but more than that I am humbled by her and the life of surrender that she continues to live. 

So to all mothers who are reading this, thank you for so often exemplifying God's heart for his people.  Thank you for demonstrating to us God's humility and sacrificial love.  Indeed, we may forget that fact, but know that you are of immense worth even when we fail to appreciate it.  To my own mother, my gratitude for all that you've done is far too small a gift to offer you.  Your life continues to show others the love of God and I am humbled that I am your son.  You are indeed a blessing to our family.  I love you mom.