Let Go.

It had been kind of a long day. I was working at camp and the groups that I worked with were a bit disrespectful and, of course, to top things off I had gotten a rather unceremonious letter in my mailbox saying that I would not be offered an interview for yet another Camp Director position. Every few minutes I would just rub my forehead trying to figure out why this keeps happening if this God’s plan for me. I began concentrating and spent some time in prayer about my situation and how it seemed God wasn’t following through on His end.

As I focused on God, I began to think about myself stranded in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean with no land in sight. I’m just treading water trying to stay afloat with absolutely no sense of direction and no obvious means of support. I start to grow tired and sink below the surface briefly, quickly gaining another burst of energy and able to keep myself afloat for a little while longer. Yet, just as my initial energy ran out, so too does this quick burst of energy and again I find myself struggling in the water. Panicking and afraid, I cry out to God, “Lord I can’t do this. I just can’t keep going like this, it’s too hard.”

I hear a faint whisper that seems to speak with authority. “I can. Just let go.”

Baffled at the reply and unsure what to do, I simply respond by treading more water until the voice comes again and says, “Ryan, let go.”

Tears streaming down my face I shout back, “God, I don’t know how!”

Gently comes the reply, “Ryan just stop treading water.”

“But I’ll drown!”

“Let go.”

Out of frustration and anger more than anything else, I stop treading water. Sure that I will sink, I intend prove to God that what he asks is impossible. To my surprise, however, I do not sink at all but rather I notice something I didn’t before. I suddenly feel the strong arms of God supporting me. They were always there just as a gentle father does as he is teaching his son to swim. I laugh for a second and wipe away my tears. Feeling a little foolish I figure out what it is that God was teaching me. So often I try to tread water and do things on my own, not trusting that God has me the entire time. I’m so busy trying to accomplish God’s plan in my life that I forget its God’s plan not mine and He determines my steps. I always seem to be the biggest obstacle in God’s plan for my life and I need to realize that I just have to let go.