Have you ever been in that situation where you talk to someone and they just look at you in a way that shows their annoyance with you and they simply ask, what do you want? Have you ever felt that way with God when praying to Him? I know personally there have been plenty of times where I'll talk to God and when I ask for requests I get this awkward feeling and ask myself, "Do I really have the right to ask Him for that or anything for that matter?" It's sad though, because that is not what God wants us to feel at all. He wants us to be able to go to Him with everything. He desires us to be honest with Him about our wants and needs. This doesn't mean that He's going to give you every desire of your heart, but it does mean that He wants you to talk to Him about them.
Currently, I am reading a book called Sacred Rhythms. The book is meant to develop useful disciplines for time alone with God and has been great for my quiet times lately. In the opening chapter of the book it talks about spiritual longings, or the desire to be closer to God. It also goes on to talk about our own desires. It makes the great point that we must be honest with God about them. Some of our desires are out of selfish motives, yet some are desires that God wants for us. In explaining why we must tell God all of the cravings of our heart, she says, "For then Jesus can gently strip away that which is false and destructive in our desire and fan into flames those desires that are good and true." By voicing our desires, the Holy Spirit has a way of really convicting us of which those are for our selfish gain and which are really for His glory. By being honest we can also distinguish between what we really want and what is simply fleeting wish. How many times do we go through life thinking we want something, only to realize much later that it wasn't what we wanted at all? We hear the story all the time of those who have amassed a great wealth and then suddenly realize that what they've worked for all their life isn't what they wanted.
Barton goes on to talk about Jesus meeting Bartimaeus along the road from Jericho. She talks about one verse in particular that really hit home with me. Jesus sees Bartimaeus who is desperate to be heard by Him. He is shouting out to Jesus, despite the rebukes to stop and Jesus comes over to him and says, "What do you want me to do for you?" (Mark 10:51). It is such a poignant verse. Here is Bartimaeus who is blind and sitting along the road outside the city. Anyone looking at him could probably tell what he wanted, but Jesus makes the point of asking him what he wants. It makes Bartimaeus really think about that question. Here is Jesus capable of giving him anything he wants and so Bartimaeus must dig deep inside and figure out what that is. We see the same encounter in Matthew except that there are two people described here, neither are named. We get to see a little more concerning the reaction that Jesus has towards the blind men. It says, "Jesus had compassion on them..." (Matthew 20:34). Jesus was moved by their honesty. They displayed faith in Him, by understanding that it was Him alone that could restore their sight. By being honest about their desires Jesus got to see their hearts and to see the vulnerability there. Their humility and honesty moved Jesus to give them sight which they then used to follow Him. What an awesome way to show their gratitude to Jesus for granting the desire of their hearts.
This really hit home with me as I have been trying to figure out what it is that I want to do with my life. Having been in Camping Ministry for a few years and dealing with seasonal work, I have been trying to discern God's calling and whether that means to stay in camping ministry or pursue other avenues. While there are many things that I could do, there are still only a few things that I desire to do. By being open and honest with God, the Holy Spirit has been able to gradually help me to make that distinction and whether those desires I have are for my benefit or for God's Glory. I believe that sometimes we must voice these desires in our heart, whatever they may be, so that we can be aware of where they are coming from. We must call out to God like Bartimaeus and like Bartimaeus we must be honest with God when He asks, "What do you want me to do for you?" I encourage you to do the same. Consider the desires of your heart. Be open and honest with God about them. If your desires are not of God, He will sift them out. We should never be afraid to go to God with our heart's longings. Instead we must boldly go to the Lord and understand that He will give us discernment. Our God does not look at us with annoyance and ask what do you want? He looks on us with compassion and asks, "What do you want me to do for you?"
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Why I write.
Last night I went to a writing group called Pages. It's a really great group where writers are able to come together and simply write about whatever is on our hearts. Often we have prompts to help stimulate us toward writing and it's just an amazing time to really focus on using our talents. Last night's prompt was a very penetrating question: Why do I write?
I guess that I write to share with others the things that are on my heart and what God is teaching me. I also just love to write. Throughout the day, I normally have my thoughts running all over the place and I can rarely sort them out. When I write though, my thoughts and ideas become focused. It is as though I have a jumbled mess the rest of the day and suddenly when I write there is order among the chaos. Everything seems to slow down and I’m able to just focus. It’s a very freeing feeling. I can write about how God is changing me for the better or how I’ve seen God in my day.
As I write I continue to become more focused and I tend to find things that are deeper. I often find direction and guidance from writing and I get the opportunity to explore the out-of-the-way places of my heart. I can’t begin to describe how often I have written only to read over it again and discover something about myself. Writing allows me to relate to God and find Him in my everyday tasks.
Lately I’ve been writing for the benefit of others. I have had this desire to share the Gospel with others and so that they may see the significance of a relationship with Jesus. In those moments, I am able to be vulnerable and real with those around me. My guard is down, because I’m doing it from a safe place. Despite the risk of revealing my heart, I feel comfortable in it and am able to show others that all of us are muddling through our Spiritual Journey one broken step at a time.
One of my favorite authors is Donald Miller. I love his writing style, because I feel that he is just being open with me and having a conversation. I think it would be awesome to be able to be a Christian writer and be able to influence others for Christ. Now I don't know if it's God's will for me to be a Christian author, but I do know that I love it. I’ve gotten the privilege of hearing from many of my friends that they have really enjoyed my writings as of late and that it has really been a blessing to them. I’m excited to hear that and am so amazed that God can use my writings to help others grow.
I must say that it is amusing for me to enjoy writing so much. I mean I was a math major in college and the only “papers” I had to write were those that I wrote Freshman year for my English 101 class. It is an ability that I can’t say I thought I’d ever have. In high school it was my weakest subject and yet today I sit here enjoying every minute of simply writing. Few things really calm or relax me as much as sitting down to write. As I write this I can feel my heart quietly ignite with excitement.
I can remember writing poetry long ago in third grade. I was so excited when I found out that I had won a competition for one of my poems. From then on, I would write poetry to express how I was feeling and it was my outlet throughout high school. It wasn’t until my Senior year of High school though, that I really felt I could write a real paper. I mean I could write for the most part and still did very well, but my writing ability was one of the things I hated doing and to be honest couldn’t see myself doing well. My English AP teacher seemed to agree with me on that point. I remember getting paper after paper with red marks everywhere and the grades to match. I couldn’t handle it and so I sat down and spoke with her. She helped me along and I just remember how my papers gradually got better and better the more I wrote. By the end of the year I was writing beautiful essays and was so thrilled to finally be good at writing.
After that I went to college where the very first semester I took English 101 and was a bit nervous. I began doubting my ability to write and so I was nervous that throughout the course she would recognize that I was not a gifted writer and that I would struggle throughout the class. Much to my surprise, I did very well in the class, in fact she asked for a copy of every essay because she was so thrilled with them. I was shocked, but my confidence in my writing stayed the same. For the next several years I had very few papers and any of my long ones were simply mathematical essays that were stale and ordered. They had no need for style, merely presented facts and proofs. I think that is why after college I was hesitant to share any of my writings with others, because I knew that they were filled with vulnerability.
Now, after writing for so long and having allowed others to be a part of that process and to read what my brain has deemed important for me to focus on, I can finally understand why I write. I write so that others can get a glimpse of the real me. I write so that they can look past the activities that I take part in, or the things that I want them to see and just see me. I think that’s what we’re all after anyway. I think that people want to be known, they want to have a face and I think that by writing I give myself a face. I allow people to see the real me, not the me gilded by my interests or activities, but the real depths of my heart.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
True Grit
Recently, Hollywood decided to remake the movie True Grit. Now I haven't seen the movie yet, but it looks pretty cool. The main character looks like one of those men who has been around a while and is, as they say, tough as nails. I'm always a sucker for those movies. I love it because you know that they've struggled through life. They aren't afraid to have their backs against the wall and seem to work well under the pressure. They're the kind of person where no matter what they're up against, you're confident that they'll make it through. They live lives of endurance.
Several years ago I participated in a 12 hour bike ride. It started at midnight and went to noon. It was so much fun, but so incredibly tiring. I was absolutely exhausted afterward. In that time I was on the bike for about 6 hours, while a friend of mine did the other 6 hours. Not to mention that I got the midnight shift, so I was in the dark for a very good portion of the ride. It is rides like these that really put your endurance to the test. The reason that it tested my endurance though, is not because it was simply a long ride. It tested it because it was a long race. I had to push myself the entire way to go as fast as I could without burning out. If it was just a long ride I could have taken my time, gone through slowly and not worried about how many laps I had completed. Endurance requires something different than simply finishing. It requires us to finish well.
One of my favorite books is called Roots of Endurance. It's by John Piper and is a biography of three men of Faith that endured incredible hardships during their lives. One of the men that Piper talks about is Charles Simeon. Now, I am utterly taken by the endurance shown in the life of Charles Simeon. He was remarkable in his love for God and in his ability to endure. Simeon was the pastor of the Holy Trinity Church in Cambridge for 54 years, taking the position almost immediately after graduating from there. The thing is that his congregation hated him so much that they would lock their pews every time he would speak so that nobody could use the pews. They would also hire an assistant to speak on Sunday afternoon rather than Simeon. They did this for 12 years! Now the obvious question here is what did Simeon do to warrant such a response and how did he handle it. Simeon preached straight from the bible every Sunday and sought to revive the faith in Cambridge. It seems that that was enough to turn his congregation against him. He spent all of his time trying to teach others about Christ and lead them to Him. Those who followed Simeon were ridiculed and despised just as much as Simeon was. Despite coming from a wealthy family and having a large inheritance from his brother, he lived in a small apartment and gave all the rest of his money to the poor. He would spend countless hours in scripture and prayer seeking out a deeply personal relationship with Jesus. All this despite the opposition against him. At one point Piper quotes Simeon in what I feel really shows the heart of Simeon in the midst of these trials. He said:
"... I prayed earnestly to my God that He would comfort me with some cordial from His word, and that, on opening the book, I might find some test which should sustain me. It was not for direction I was looking, for I am no friend to such superstitions... but only for support. The first text which caught my eye was this: ' They found a many of Cyrene, Simon by name; him they compelled to bear His cross.' ... what a blessed hint of my encouragement! To have the cross laid on me, that I might bear it after Jesus -- what a privilege!"
Simeon understood that in order to endure under these hardships, he must devote himself fully to God and to accept these trials as a privilege. What an amazing life of endurance!
Simeon's life was grounded in a personal relationship with Christ in which he shared in the hardships of Jesus. Jesus is of course our model for endurance. We see it often in scripture. The pharisees often plotted His murder along with attempts at turning all of His disciples against Him. He would lose friends throughout His journey and would be betrayed by one of those closest to Him. Jesus endured separation from the Father for the first time and endured the weight of all our sins so that we might have life. Jesus, the son of God, came to Earth, endured being mocked, cursed and spit on by the very ones that He came to save. The king stepped down from His throne and took the pauper's place in the gallows. He endured our punishment and suffered for our transgressions.
There is a spot in Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers where Theoden, King of Rohan is locked in the main hall with the door barricaded and a swarm of orcs outside trying to get in, he says this, "What can men do against such reckless hate."
Aragorn responds, "Ride out with me."
Jesus has told us that the world would hate us, but that we must endure and continue to share the good news. Our backs are against the wall and Jesus is saying, "Ride out with me."
Several years ago I participated in a 12 hour bike ride. It started at midnight and went to noon. It was so much fun, but so incredibly tiring. I was absolutely exhausted afterward. In that time I was on the bike for about 6 hours, while a friend of mine did the other 6 hours. Not to mention that I got the midnight shift, so I was in the dark for a very good portion of the ride. It is rides like these that really put your endurance to the test. The reason that it tested my endurance though, is not because it was simply a long ride. It tested it because it was a long race. I had to push myself the entire way to go as fast as I could without burning out. If it was just a long ride I could have taken my time, gone through slowly and not worried about how many laps I had completed. Endurance requires something different than simply finishing. It requires us to finish well.
One of my favorite books is called Roots of Endurance. It's by John Piper and is a biography of three men of Faith that endured incredible hardships during their lives. One of the men that Piper talks about is Charles Simeon. Now, I am utterly taken by the endurance shown in the life of Charles Simeon. He was remarkable in his love for God and in his ability to endure. Simeon was the pastor of the Holy Trinity Church in Cambridge for 54 years, taking the position almost immediately after graduating from there. The thing is that his congregation hated him so much that they would lock their pews every time he would speak so that nobody could use the pews. They would also hire an assistant to speak on Sunday afternoon rather than Simeon. They did this for 12 years! Now the obvious question here is what did Simeon do to warrant such a response and how did he handle it. Simeon preached straight from the bible every Sunday and sought to revive the faith in Cambridge. It seems that that was enough to turn his congregation against him. He spent all of his time trying to teach others about Christ and lead them to Him. Those who followed Simeon were ridiculed and despised just as much as Simeon was. Despite coming from a wealthy family and having a large inheritance from his brother, he lived in a small apartment and gave all the rest of his money to the poor. He would spend countless hours in scripture and prayer seeking out a deeply personal relationship with Jesus. All this despite the opposition against him. At one point Piper quotes Simeon in what I feel really shows the heart of Simeon in the midst of these trials. He said:
"... I prayed earnestly to my God that He would comfort me with some cordial from His word, and that, on opening the book, I might find some test which should sustain me. It was not for direction I was looking, for I am no friend to such superstitions... but only for support. The first text which caught my eye was this: ' They found a many of Cyrene, Simon by name; him they compelled to bear His cross.' ... what a blessed hint of my encouragement! To have the cross laid on me, that I might bear it after Jesus -- what a privilege!"
Simeon understood that in order to endure under these hardships, he must devote himself fully to God and to accept these trials as a privilege. What an amazing life of endurance!
Simeon's life was grounded in a personal relationship with Christ in which he shared in the hardships of Jesus. Jesus is of course our model for endurance. We see it often in scripture. The pharisees often plotted His murder along with attempts at turning all of His disciples against Him. He would lose friends throughout His journey and would be betrayed by one of those closest to Him. Jesus endured separation from the Father for the first time and endured the weight of all our sins so that we might have life. Jesus, the son of God, came to Earth, endured being mocked, cursed and spit on by the very ones that He came to save. The king stepped down from His throne and took the pauper's place in the gallows. He endured our punishment and suffered for our transgressions.
There is a spot in Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers where Theoden, King of Rohan is locked in the main hall with the door barricaded and a swarm of orcs outside trying to get in, he says this, "What can men do against such reckless hate."
Aragorn responds, "Ride out with me."
Jesus has told us that the world would hate us, but that we must endure and continue to share the good news. Our backs are against the wall and Jesus is saying, "Ride out with me."
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Faith
What is your definition of faith? Using your definition of faith, ask yourself: Do I have faith? When I think of faith, I think of the widow who gave the only two coins she had to the church. This story is found in both Mark and Luke. Now it is believed that Mark, while written by Mark was first the testimony of Peter. I can only imagine what this must have felt like to Peter. Having seen this old widow who was very poor give the only two coins that she had. Peter must have watched and heard Jesus speak and been struck to the core. It was earlier in Mark that Peter tried to walk on water and Jesus had to rescue him. I believe that faith it something that Peter aspired to ever since that point and then to see this woman to do this must have been quite the experience. She expressed such a faith that I believe it moved several of the disciples to tears. She didn't know how she was going to survive after giving away her only coins, but she did it anyway in faith. As Hebrews says, "Faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." Now I can say that I have faith in God, but if I'm not actively showing that I believe in God, then I don't really have faith, just as James says that faith without action is dead.
So that brings up another question, what does faith really look like? Does this mean that we are all supposed to give up everything that we have for Christ? Are we supposed to be like the rich young ruler who is told to sell everything he has and follow Jesus? In a spiritual sense, the answer is yes. We are to focus entirely on Christ and what He wants in our life. When we become burdened down with what we have and worry about gaining more, then we lose sight of God. In a practical sense that means doing things intentionally in pursuit of God and using every opportunity to glorify Him. It means taking yourself out of your comfort zone and doing things to advance His kingdom. That may look very different in your own life. Maybe in your own life, it simply means donating money to the church. It may also mean leaving your very comfortable job for a ministry position that pays a lot less. Faith is about sacrificing something to allow God to show up. If we do things on our own, then we're not really using faith, we're simply doing it on our own. When we exercise our faith, we are believing God is who He says He is. It is no wonder that we have such a difficult time with faith. It goes against our logic and our societal norms, yet this is exactly what God calls us to. It's amazing at how we often treat those who act in faith. Their actions don't make sense to us, we may even condemn them for being stupid or at best just assume they are ignorant. We tell them that that isn't how the world works or try to explain to them that they are making a poor decision. The thing is that God has an upside-down kingdom. The things that make sense in our world, make none in His.
I was reading Donald Miller's book Searching for God Knows What. In it Miller describes his lifeboat theory where all of us are trying to prove to everyone else why we are better than others in order for us to stay in the lifeboat. He also describes how Jesus lived and how he did not ascribe to that theory, rather he did everything against that theory. He showed the value of those who were marginalized and how our world needed to learn that we must not show favoritism. Now I believe this lifeboat theory also applies to faith. Often times when we are acting in faith, everyone else may think that we're weird or being naive. If we get caught up in what everyone else thinks then our faith can begin to waiver. If, however, we remember that God loves us and that our faith is our response to that love, then it is our obligation to continue to step out in faith, despite the jeers of those around us. Faith feels unnatural and I think that is why God desires it from us. After all, God wants our devotion to Him to be unhindered and unobstructed and wants us to fall madly in love with Him, just as He is madly in love with us.
So that brings up another question, what does faith really look like? Does this mean that we are all supposed to give up everything that we have for Christ? Are we supposed to be like the rich young ruler who is told to sell everything he has and follow Jesus? In a spiritual sense, the answer is yes. We are to focus entirely on Christ and what He wants in our life. When we become burdened down with what we have and worry about gaining more, then we lose sight of God. In a practical sense that means doing things intentionally in pursuit of God and using every opportunity to glorify Him. It means taking yourself out of your comfort zone and doing things to advance His kingdom. That may look very different in your own life. Maybe in your own life, it simply means donating money to the church. It may also mean leaving your very comfortable job for a ministry position that pays a lot less. Faith is about sacrificing something to allow God to show up. If we do things on our own, then we're not really using faith, we're simply doing it on our own. When we exercise our faith, we are believing God is who He says He is. It is no wonder that we have such a difficult time with faith. It goes against our logic and our societal norms, yet this is exactly what God calls us to. It's amazing at how we often treat those who act in faith. Their actions don't make sense to us, we may even condemn them for being stupid or at best just assume they are ignorant. We tell them that that isn't how the world works or try to explain to them that they are making a poor decision. The thing is that God has an upside-down kingdom. The things that make sense in our world, make none in His.
I was reading Donald Miller's book Searching for God Knows What. In it Miller describes his lifeboat theory where all of us are trying to prove to everyone else why we are better than others in order for us to stay in the lifeboat. He also describes how Jesus lived and how he did not ascribe to that theory, rather he did everything against that theory. He showed the value of those who were marginalized and how our world needed to learn that we must not show favoritism. Now I believe this lifeboat theory also applies to faith. Often times when we are acting in faith, everyone else may think that we're weird or being naive. If we get caught up in what everyone else thinks then our faith can begin to waiver. If, however, we remember that God loves us and that our faith is our response to that love, then it is our obligation to continue to step out in faith, despite the jeers of those around us. Faith feels unnatural and I think that is why God desires it from us. After all, God wants our devotion to Him to be unhindered and unobstructed and wants us to fall madly in love with Him, just as He is madly in love with us.
Monday, December 20, 2010
Perfect Imperfection
Every now and then I am reminded of some great Spiritual Truth. It always catches me be surprise and it's as though I am rediscovering my toes. It's always been there and I've seemed to take it for granted until now. It's as though all of a sudden I've realized its importance in my life and its life altering implications. I was contemplating the lyrics of a Skillet song that says "You were fearfully and Wonderfully Made". They are quoting David here from Psalm 139 where David is just in awe of God. Its a beautiful Psalm. He just pours out emotion into it and tells of how God has crafted him within his mother's womb. How God saw his "unformed body" and how "all the days ordained for me were written within your book before one of them came to be". David has discovered here how unique he is and how the maker of all the Earth, the One whose "works are wonderful," has created him in His own image. Something that David is not doing here though, is thanking God for specific things about him. He is thanking God for making him exactly as he is including every good characteristic and every imperfection.
Now David certainly had a lot of things going for him, but he certainly wasn't perfect. More notable of his failures include adultery and murder which of course both took place late in life. So why did David sink to that level? Why would he, after being so close with God, decide to commit adultery and then cover it up with murder? If you look through 2 Samuel, you see that David starts out as a war hero, who has slain many Philistines and has been made King over Israel. As the book continues though, you see that David starts to remain at the palace more and more while he sends his troops to fight instead. This man who has fought many battles, probably has the battle scars to prove it, was now sitting in his palace bored. As other soldiers would come back to bring him the news, he probably ached to go to battle, to be back on the front lines and probably started to doubt himself. Suddenly those slight imperfections that he saw in himself began to waiver his self-confidence and that is when his focus came off God and onto himself and slipped into failure.
This Psalm, however, shows David understanding his imperfections and taking hold of them in joy. He is grateful for being exactly who he is, every little imperfection included. He says that he is fearfully and wonderfully made. Those character flaws and imperfections lead him to have a deeper understanding of God's love for Him which in turn gave him a greater Love for God.
I want to be clear before we continue that when I talk about imperfections I am not talking about sin. I am more talking about imperfections that we see in ourselves that if we simply allow God to work, He can use them for His Glory. Here is a story that I'm sure you've heard before, but helps me to illustrate my point.
One day long ago there was a servant who had the responsibility of getting water for his master. Every day the man would take the same two water jugs with him to fetch water from down the road. He would fill both jugs up as much as he could and then would begin to walk back down the road. One of these jugs had a crack in it and would leak water as he walked. The jug would try its best to hold as much water as it could, but could never hold all of it. Day after day the servant would take the jugs to get water and day after day the jug could not hold the water. It began to feel bad about itself and jealous of the one that could hold all of the water. One day it spoke to the servant and cried, "I am sorry, but no matter what I do I can't hold the water like the other jug."
The servant replied, "My friend, have you not noticed the side of the road that I carry you on. Do you not see all the beautiful flowers that are along the road? It is because of you that they are there. If it weren't for you I would not be able to decorate my master's table with beautiful flowers. You see I knew about the crack in you and kept you on that side so that you would water these plants."
From that day on the jug prided itself in seeing the beauty caused by the leaking water.
God knows our imperfections, because He is the one who created us. We are fearfully and wonderfully made and because of that our imperfections are made for God's glory. Take Peter for example. After they arrested Jesus, Peter denied Christ three times showing his almost cowardly behavior. Then in Acts we see Peter as this awesome pillar of the early church. God used Peter's imperfection to share this sharp contrast and to display the Holy Spirit's power. It was for God's glory. Without Peter's self-doubt and cowardice early on, we wouldn't be able to see God's transforming power in his life.
The idea that I was created by God is such an amazing concept and completely life changing. Everything about me was designed by Him. Every little thing that makes me, me was thought of before I was born. The other day was a Lunar Eclipse. This particular eclipse happened on the winter solstice, a phenomenon that hasn't happened in the last 300 years. I was born during this unique time so that I could appreciate the beauty of it just as every part of me was uniquely designed to serve God's purpose in my life. Things that I see as imperfections are not imperfections in His eyes. No, our imperfections are perfections of His Glory. Due to my love of photography I get to see this a lot. Often times I have to take a lot of pictures just to get the right shot in some cases, but every now and then, there are photos that I take that are accidents that prove to be even more beautiful than the original photo. I took a few photos of the Lunar Eclipse and some came out very well, but there was one that I absolutely loved and it wasn't at all perfect, but beautiful nonetheless.
It is through these imperfections that we will be able to give Glory to God and have the opportunity to see His work in our lives. It is beautiful to see that God had me designed and created in such a way as this, so that I might have perfect imperfections.
Now David certainly had a lot of things going for him, but he certainly wasn't perfect. More notable of his failures include adultery and murder which of course both took place late in life. So why did David sink to that level? Why would he, after being so close with God, decide to commit adultery and then cover it up with murder? If you look through 2 Samuel, you see that David starts out as a war hero, who has slain many Philistines and has been made King over Israel. As the book continues though, you see that David starts to remain at the palace more and more while he sends his troops to fight instead. This man who has fought many battles, probably has the battle scars to prove it, was now sitting in his palace bored. As other soldiers would come back to bring him the news, he probably ached to go to battle, to be back on the front lines and probably started to doubt himself. Suddenly those slight imperfections that he saw in himself began to waiver his self-confidence and that is when his focus came off God and onto himself and slipped into failure.
This Psalm, however, shows David understanding his imperfections and taking hold of them in joy. He is grateful for being exactly who he is, every little imperfection included. He says that he is fearfully and wonderfully made. Those character flaws and imperfections lead him to have a deeper understanding of God's love for Him which in turn gave him a greater Love for God.
I want to be clear before we continue that when I talk about imperfections I am not talking about sin. I am more talking about imperfections that we see in ourselves that if we simply allow God to work, He can use them for His Glory. Here is a story that I'm sure you've heard before, but helps me to illustrate my point.
One day long ago there was a servant who had the responsibility of getting water for his master. Every day the man would take the same two water jugs with him to fetch water from down the road. He would fill both jugs up as much as he could and then would begin to walk back down the road. One of these jugs had a crack in it and would leak water as he walked. The jug would try its best to hold as much water as it could, but could never hold all of it. Day after day the servant would take the jugs to get water and day after day the jug could not hold the water. It began to feel bad about itself and jealous of the one that could hold all of the water. One day it spoke to the servant and cried, "I am sorry, but no matter what I do I can't hold the water like the other jug."
The servant replied, "My friend, have you not noticed the side of the road that I carry you on. Do you not see all the beautiful flowers that are along the road? It is because of you that they are there. If it weren't for you I would not be able to decorate my master's table with beautiful flowers. You see I knew about the crack in you and kept you on that side so that you would water these plants."
From that day on the jug prided itself in seeing the beauty caused by the leaking water.
God knows our imperfections, because He is the one who created us. We are fearfully and wonderfully made and because of that our imperfections are made for God's glory. Take Peter for example. After they arrested Jesus, Peter denied Christ three times showing his almost cowardly behavior. Then in Acts we see Peter as this awesome pillar of the early church. God used Peter's imperfection to share this sharp contrast and to display the Holy Spirit's power. It was for God's glory. Without Peter's self-doubt and cowardice early on, we wouldn't be able to see God's transforming power in his life.
The idea that I was created by God is such an amazing concept and completely life changing. Everything about me was designed by Him. Every little thing that makes me, me was thought of before I was born. The other day was a Lunar Eclipse. This particular eclipse happened on the winter solstice, a phenomenon that hasn't happened in the last 300 years. I was born during this unique time so that I could appreciate the beauty of it just as every part of me was uniquely designed to serve God's purpose in my life. Things that I see as imperfections are not imperfections in His eyes. No, our imperfections are perfections of His Glory. Due to my love of photography I get to see this a lot. Often times I have to take a lot of pictures just to get the right shot in some cases, but every now and then, there are photos that I take that are accidents that prove to be even more beautiful than the original photo. I took a few photos of the Lunar Eclipse and some came out very well, but there was one that I absolutely loved and it wasn't at all perfect, but beautiful nonetheless.
It is through these imperfections that we will be able to give Glory to God and have the opportunity to see His work in our lives. It is beautiful to see that God had me designed and created in such a way as this, so that I might have perfect imperfections.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Winter
I've had trouble writing lately, I have been distracted it seems, or simply uninspired. It could have something to do with the approaching season. We are currently on our way to winter, a season that many people loathe. I can certainly understand why. The other day, while driving, I noticed how bleak and dismal everything looked. The trees were all without leaves, the grass was dying off, even the clouds were not their normal bubbly selves having been replaced by sheets of gray. Whenever I visit my grandparents in Ocean City during the holidays I'm amazed at the scenes. The parking lots normally filled with cars and shoppers is now vacant and utterly deserted. The boardwalk, normally teaming with life and the air filled with the smell of french fries and fudge, is left like a ghost town with signs in the windows saying closed for the winter. It is no wonder that people get depressed or get cabin fever during the winter. It is in complete contrast with all of the other seasons.
If we're honest with ourselves we can acknowledge that we have seasons in our spiritual lives. there are times in our lives where we are bursting forth with fruit and when our growth is evident in all that we do. Other times in our lives we are filled with joy and wonder at new experiences. Still there are other times where we simply shine in our own unique ways and are simply content. Yet we all have our winter seasons. They may seem filled with little spiritual growth, if any. It may be hard to pray or your spiritual disciplines may seem like a chore. I know in my life whenever I hit these points I often wonder how did I get here and why am I here. The other day however I began thinking about it more. Sure winter can be one of those seasons where people are just ready to be done with, but there is such beauty in it.
During the winter, depending on where you live, you get to see snow begin to fall. It lays down this beautiful white blanket of snowflakes, whose intricate design can only be described as an artistic masterpiece. As the snow melts it creates icicles that hang like chandeliers all around. The gentle dripping keeps time allowing us to slow down and enjoy the splendor of it. No other season allows for this kind of beauty. No other time can you experience it. It also rings in true in our spiritual lives. When we are in the winter of our spiritual lives, we should look at it as an opportunity to experience and see a beauty that we can't see the other times. We get to see God work through our weakness, we have the chance to get a better assessment of our relationship with God. During the other seasons, it can be easy to be close to God. They are often marked by our spiritual growth and excitement. In the winter of our spiritual life, however, we may feel distant from God which He allows so that we can truly investigate our relationship with Him. He gives us the opportunity to step back and just admire the beauty of it. When you are in a spiritual winter, take that time to slow down, investigate what God is trying to teach you.
If we're honest with ourselves we can acknowledge that we have seasons in our spiritual lives. there are times in our lives where we are bursting forth with fruit and when our growth is evident in all that we do. Other times in our lives we are filled with joy and wonder at new experiences. Still there are other times where we simply shine in our own unique ways and are simply content. Yet we all have our winter seasons. They may seem filled with little spiritual growth, if any. It may be hard to pray or your spiritual disciplines may seem like a chore. I know in my life whenever I hit these points I often wonder how did I get here and why am I here. The other day however I began thinking about it more. Sure winter can be one of those seasons where people are just ready to be done with, but there is such beauty in it.
During the winter, depending on where you live, you get to see snow begin to fall. It lays down this beautiful white blanket of snowflakes, whose intricate design can only be described as an artistic masterpiece. As the snow melts it creates icicles that hang like chandeliers all around. The gentle dripping keeps time allowing us to slow down and enjoy the splendor of it. No other season allows for this kind of beauty. No other time can you experience it. It also rings in true in our spiritual lives. When we are in the winter of our spiritual lives, we should look at it as an opportunity to experience and see a beauty that we can't see the other times. We get to see God work through our weakness, we have the chance to get a better assessment of our relationship with God. During the other seasons, it can be easy to be close to God. They are often marked by our spiritual growth and excitement. In the winter of our spiritual life, however, we may feel distant from God which He allows so that we can truly investigate our relationship with Him. He gives us the opportunity to step back and just admire the beauty of it. When you are in a spiritual winter, take that time to slow down, investigate what God is trying to teach you.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Waiting
Driving down the road the other day I ran into a bit of traffic. Now I think its fair to say that nobody enjoys traffic. There are few things worse than just sitting in traffic waiting to get to your exit or through the traffic light. It feels like we're not getting anything done in the process, we are simply stopped with nothing to do. So here I am, nearly back at my house and I get stuck at a traffic light with a line of cars so far back that I can't even see the traffic light. Fortunately, I know the area moderately well and so I make a quick left turn and through the community I go. I take all the right side streets and stop at all the stop signs along the way and a few minutes later I arrive at my destination. The interesting thing is that in the amount of time it took me to go through the community, it probably would have taken me less time to simply wait at the traffic light. So why did it feel so much better to drive through the community than to wait at the traffic light? The answer is simple because I wasn't waiting. Waiting is something that we have grown to find as an annoyance, especially in American culture where instant gratification is king.
God has something to say about waiting though. He says those who wait upon the Lord will inherit the Earth (Psalm 37:9). He also says that if we wait upon Him that he will strengthen our heart (Psalm 27:14). We are called to wait upon the Lord, but what does that mean in our own lives? What does it look like to wait upon the Lord?
Recently, I have been struggling to find a full-time position in camping ministry. I have been doing it for a number of years now and have unfortunately been unable to come up with anything other than seasonal work. It can be frustrating and discouraging at times, but the one thing that gets me through it is God pushing me on to follow Him. I'm currently in a season of my life where I'm very unsure of my next step and so I've been trying to fill in the next step anyway I possibly can. It feels very much like I am stuck in traffic, despite having urgent things to do. I want to rush God's plan for my life and yet God wants me to wait and continues to say not yet.
Have you ever thought about why God wants us to wait? The obvious answer here is so that we will appreciate it more when we finally get it. We see this example all the time with children who are told that they have to wait and save up money to buy something and when they finally do, they cling to that as their most prized possession. We also see however another answer to this question. God wants us to wait, because we don't always know the true desires of our heart. How many times have you seen something in the mall and decided to wait to buy it only to find later that you didn't want it anyway? Or how many times have you bought something only to find that a week later you are no longer using it and it begins to collect dust till your next yard sale? Waiting is a gift from God. Sure it doesn't feel like it, but it is. He wants us to rely on Him, to wait on Him, to confidently go in the direction that he wants us to go. If that means waiting in traffic along the way then we wait. There is hope though. No matter how bad the traffic is, it always clears up.
God has something to say about waiting though. He says those who wait upon the Lord will inherit the Earth (Psalm 37:9). He also says that if we wait upon Him that he will strengthen our heart (Psalm 27:14). We are called to wait upon the Lord, but what does that mean in our own lives? What does it look like to wait upon the Lord?
Recently, I have been struggling to find a full-time position in camping ministry. I have been doing it for a number of years now and have unfortunately been unable to come up with anything other than seasonal work. It can be frustrating and discouraging at times, but the one thing that gets me through it is God pushing me on to follow Him. I'm currently in a season of my life where I'm very unsure of my next step and so I've been trying to fill in the next step anyway I possibly can. It feels very much like I am stuck in traffic, despite having urgent things to do. I want to rush God's plan for my life and yet God wants me to wait and continues to say not yet.
Have you ever thought about why God wants us to wait? The obvious answer here is so that we will appreciate it more when we finally get it. We see this example all the time with children who are told that they have to wait and save up money to buy something and when they finally do, they cling to that as their most prized possession. We also see however another answer to this question. God wants us to wait, because we don't always know the true desires of our heart. How many times have you seen something in the mall and decided to wait to buy it only to find later that you didn't want it anyway? Or how many times have you bought something only to find that a week later you are no longer using it and it begins to collect dust till your next yard sale? Waiting is a gift from God. Sure it doesn't feel like it, but it is. He wants us to rely on Him, to wait on Him, to confidently go in the direction that he wants us to go. If that means waiting in traffic along the way then we wait. There is hope though. No matter how bad the traffic is, it always clears up.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)