Recently I spent a few days in Gettysburg with some of the other interns. While I was there I could not help but feel the passion that was evident in the people that fought and died there. On both sides of the war, they had this all encompassing passion that pushed them on through the tough times and the moments of hardship and despair. In the museum there are many letters from the lines, both to their loved ones and from their loved ones. These letters convey their earnest to do what is right and their unbridled desire to see it done. This passion that they had is something that has clearly been lost on this generation. Their lives were ruled by it and everything that they did displayed it for all to see. So what happened? Why after over a hundred years has this reckless passion disappeared? Why are we now ruled by an apathy that is as contagious as the passion that was once held by our forefathers and those in the civil war?
I think that one of the reasons is that we're afraid of passion. It is frightening and it makes people do crazy things. When you are passionate about something your mind tends to focus on just that and people think you're obsessed or even worse. Once you've tasted passion and seen its effects in your life you can't help but be passionate about everything else. God's stance on passion is pretty obvious as well. On several occasions Jesus says to leave everything and follow Him. He wants your entire focus to be on Him, not to be distracted by the worries of your day or the things that you have or even desire. He says at one point that you are neither Hot nor Cold so I will spit you out of my mouth. He doesn't want a lukewarm affection, He wants an unbridled, reckless love.
It is very easy to go through life without experiencing passion for something. It is passion however that can alter the entire shape of the world. I went to an event put on by World Vision and while I was there I read about a four year old girl who started a non-profit organization that sends thousands of toys to children in Africa. A four year old with a passion for serving others was able to change the world. Another story is that of the person who at the age of 16 started a movement entitled Loose change to loosen chains. He is now collecting money around the world to help free those still under slavery. His passion has altered the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. Can you imagine what this world would be like if each of us was passionate about serving God?
I know that in my life I have been in both places. I can tell from experience that being passionate is not easy. You tend to get burned by it, sometimes its hard and makes life even more difficult. There are times where you just want a break from it as it can be mentally, physically and emotionally draining. I can tell you also from experience that there is no other way to live life fully than to live passionately for Christ. So don't be afraid to be burned, or get hurt; don't be afraid to be thought crazy or a fool; don't back away when things get tough; stand up and passionately live your life for Christ.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Uncompromising Trust
Today I was reading from Ruthless Trust and I came across a story about a monk that really made me stop and think. The monk was in prayer for many years asking God to bring him a spiritual mentor that could help him to become more like Christ. One day he had an internal feeling to go to the steps of the cathedral. There he met a beggar. He said to the beggar I hope that you have a good day and a happy life. The beggar responded that of course he would, but that he really didn't understand the monk. You see the beggar looked at every day as a gift from God, that every day was a blessing in and of itself. God created every day and it didn't matter what happened on any given day as it was still another day to praise God. On top of that our lives are in God's hands, when we surrender to a perfect trust in God we realize that every circumstance in our lives is for His glory. Everything is meant for Him, whether we see the purpose behind it or not. When we focus on how a circumstance affects us then we've missed the point completely. It is meant to be a blessing and a way for us to bring Him glory.
It kind of goes along with my devotion for today from At His Feet by Chris Tiegreen. In it Tiegreen is discussing Luke 17:7-10. Jesus is talking to the disciples about how a servant doesn't stop and take a break just because he has completed a task, he does all that the master requires of him. When the servant starts thinking about what he is going to gain from something or when his focus falls off of his master and onto himself, then the servant is doing everything for the wrong motives and is no longer serving the way he should. We often look at our tasks as something that we can do to sort of pay back God in a way, but that is not it at all. We are called to be obedient, we are called to trust in God's plan. The things that we do for God should not be looked at as some sort of task that makes us better Christians, but as a gift from God that allows us to bring glory to Him. When we are doing a task we should not think of it as something that will give us a reward, but when doing the task we should be thankful for simply having the opportunity to be doing that task.
It is a humbling thought though to realize that none of this is really about us. I mean yes God blesses us and takes pleasure in doing so, but when we get so focused on God blessing us, we miss out on everything else that He gives us. Just like this beggar who trusted that everything in his life was a gift from God and went through life trusting that God's perfect plan includes both the tough times and the good. The biggest thing we can learn from this is to remember that our focus should be God's glory not our own wants and desires. When we focus on ourselves we miss the points where God is blessing us in ways that we didn't realize before. I, therefore, urge you to keep your focus on God and not your own desires, because it just isn't about us anyway.
It kind of goes along with my devotion for today from At His Feet by Chris Tiegreen. In it Tiegreen is discussing Luke 17:7-10. Jesus is talking to the disciples about how a servant doesn't stop and take a break just because he has completed a task, he does all that the master requires of him. When the servant starts thinking about what he is going to gain from something or when his focus falls off of his master and onto himself, then the servant is doing everything for the wrong motives and is no longer serving the way he should. We often look at our tasks as something that we can do to sort of pay back God in a way, but that is not it at all. We are called to be obedient, we are called to trust in God's plan. The things that we do for God should not be looked at as some sort of task that makes us better Christians, but as a gift from God that allows us to bring glory to Him. When we are doing a task we should not think of it as something that will give us a reward, but when doing the task we should be thankful for simply having the opportunity to be doing that task.
It is a humbling thought though to realize that none of this is really about us. I mean yes God blesses us and takes pleasure in doing so, but when we get so focused on God blessing us, we miss out on everything else that He gives us. Just like this beggar who trusted that everything in his life was a gift from God and went through life trusting that God's perfect plan includes both the tough times and the good. The biggest thing we can learn from this is to remember that our focus should be God's glory not our own wants and desires. When we focus on ourselves we miss the points where God is blessing us in ways that we didn't realize before. I, therefore, urge you to keep your focus on God and not your own desires, because it just isn't about us anyway.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Homesick
My heart longs for it beyond anything.
I can feel the gentle yet firm pull on my soul.
The faces stare back at me pleading for something.
Their clothes tattered and torn, a shoe missing a sole.
The landscape as beautiful as the eyes staring back at me.
I pick up the rich soil and let it run through my hands.
I'm taken up in the moment as I look out and see
The multitude of people who outnumber the sands.
Struggling for something worthwhile to say
A few mumbling words manage to escape my lips
They smile, nod and affirm me in their own way.
My heart pounds, down my face the tear drips.
Such a love I do not know despite my deepest longing.
Awakened by my dream I am unable to stop singing.
Soon, I say, will I return to embrace and be embraced.
I will see again what they have struggled and faced.
I can feel the gentle yet firm pull on my soul.
The faces stare back at me pleading for something.
Their clothes tattered and torn, a shoe missing a sole.
The landscape as beautiful as the eyes staring back at me.
I pick up the rich soil and let it run through my hands.
I'm taken up in the moment as I look out and see
The multitude of people who outnumber the sands.
Struggling for something worthwhile to say
A few mumbling words manage to escape my lips
They smile, nod and affirm me in their own way.
My heart pounds, down my face the tear drips.
Such a love I do not know despite my deepest longing.
Awakened by my dream I am unable to stop singing.
Soon, I say, will I return to embrace and be embraced.
I will see again what they have struggled and faced.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Being a Servant
During the last week or so I have been struck by a verse in Phillipians. Phillipians 2:14 Do everything without complaining or arguing. It has been reinforced by one of the verses preceding it Phillipians 2:3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Those two verses have completely changed my thought process. Jesus came to Earth to be a servant to sinners. He came to be the lowliest of low. He was spit on, stoned, beaten, flogged, persecuted, and crucified. He did not argue or complain. He did none of these things to gain attention to himself. If he had wanted to, He could have done many more miraculous things including stepping off the cross, but He did what the Father wanted Him to do. I can't begin to tell of all the times that I've complained or argued with something that I just didn't see the logic in. The number of times where the authority in my life didn't make sense to me. What is worse, however, is I can't describe the number of times where I have tried to be a servant only so that I can draw attention to myself.
There was a point the other day where I had to do a few things that were rather difficult and were pretty labor intensive that nobody else had to do. I knew that if I simply said something about it, I would get sympathy and then I could shrug it off as nothing, when really all I wanted was attention. That is the furthest thing from being a servant, because the only thing I'm serving in that moment is myself. To be a servant we must take on the lowliest position whatever that is. Sometimes it is not the person handing out food at a homeless shelter, sometimes it is the person who is actually eating with the homeless, because in that moment you step down out of your comfort zone and cease to think about yourself. These verses have really hit home with me. I know that I still fail at this and still use times of serving to gain the approval of others, but I hope that with a constant reminder of these verses that I will be able to remember the true point of being a servant, that I will be able to do everything out of Love for God.
There was a point the other day where I had to do a few things that were rather difficult and were pretty labor intensive that nobody else had to do. I knew that if I simply said something about it, I would get sympathy and then I could shrug it off as nothing, when really all I wanted was attention. That is the furthest thing from being a servant, because the only thing I'm serving in that moment is myself. To be a servant we must take on the lowliest position whatever that is. Sometimes it is not the person handing out food at a homeless shelter, sometimes it is the person who is actually eating with the homeless, because in that moment you step down out of your comfort zone and cease to think about yourself. These verses have really hit home with me. I know that I still fail at this and still use times of serving to gain the approval of others, but I hope that with a constant reminder of these verses that I will be able to remember the true point of being a servant, that I will be able to do everything out of Love for God.
Pennies
Lately I've been cleaning a lot as part of the internship at River Valley Ranch. There is something that I always seem to come across during that time, pennies. These small coins are considered by many as completely worthless or even an annoyance. I heard a story several years ago about a person who was rather rich, but he would always pick up a penny when he saw it on the ground, because it has the words "In God We Trust" engraved on it. The main part of the story is the man telling someone that every time he picks up a penny he reevaluates how he is living his life and whether or not he is really trusting God in that moment. If he is, he thanks God and keeps the penny as a sign of God's promise. If he is not, he steps back, prays and gives everything over to God and then keeps the penny as a sign of his commitment to trusting God. He goes on to say that he is glad that God is patient and that pennies are plentiful.
As I said though, I have been finding many of these pennies and I'm constantly reminded of this story and have passed it along to many of the other interns. Its easy to think about the story and think, man that is cool. Its a different story entirely to live it out. I mean really trusting God with everything in my life. Every single issue that goes through my head. Its a daunting task. Logic will often scream to me that my trust makes no sense and that it will only result in hardship for me. My own desires continually block my ability to see that I need to be trusting in the sovereign God. I'm sure that I'm not alone in that. Full out trust in an invisible God can seem difficult and can even lead to frustration at times, but we must trust nonetheless. Just as the man in the story said, I'm glad that God is patient and that pennies are plentiful.
As I said though, I have been finding many of these pennies and I'm constantly reminded of this story and have passed it along to many of the other interns. Its easy to think about the story and think, man that is cool. Its a different story entirely to live it out. I mean really trusting God with everything in my life. Every single issue that goes through my head. Its a daunting task. Logic will often scream to me that my trust makes no sense and that it will only result in hardship for me. My own desires continually block my ability to see that I need to be trusting in the sovereign God. I'm sure that I'm not alone in that. Full out trust in an invisible God can seem difficult and can even lead to frustration at times, but we must trust nonetheless. Just as the man in the story said, I'm glad that God is patient and that pennies are plentiful.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Second Chances
Sitting at a table with a good friend of mine we ae simply enjoying a lunch together. He asks me in a sort of casual way, "What is the biggest problem with the world that you see?"
The question of course catches me off guard but I've come to expect this from him and so I sit and think about it for a while. I begin thinking about what the problems of my generation seem to revolve around and I answer, "Apathy. It is the one thing that keeps us from action and even caring about the hurts and pains of others. Love becomes trivialized because of it and it changes us completely from what God intended us to be."
He nods his head and we talk for a little while longer about it. As we're speaking I see a man with a long scraggly beard and a baseball cap. Other than noticing him, nothing else registers. Fifteen minutes later I see him walk out of the Chick-Fil-A with several bags around him made of old shirts. He was a homeless man and I didn't even care enough to realize it. I beat myself up about it quite a bit the rest of the day and even the following day I had a conversation about it discussing my own hypocrisy with another good friend. This time as I'm talking with her, she points behind me and standing just a few short feet behind is the same man from the day before. I turn around, smile, then get up and walk over to him having absolutely no idea what I'm doing. I say to him "Would you like to have breakfast with us and can I get you anything?"
He humbly replies, "Sure let me set this stuff down."
We walk up to the counter and the previously friendly cashier suddenly seems much more stern and almost irritable. I pay for his meal and we sit down to eat. We talk for a while about his plans and where he is headed. He tells us about his life and shares with us his past. He mentions that he is trying to get to Manassas just 20 miles north of where we are but trains don't run on Sundays or at least harder to get to as fewer people take them. I begin thinking and praying, "What is it that you'd like me to do Lord?"
"Take him to church with you."
"I can't really do that God. Maybe I can give him a couple bucks and pray for him."
"Take him to church then take him to Manassas."
"No, no you're not listening God, I can't do that. I only have a little time to Spend with my friend here and I don't want to waste it."
"Alright, Ryan I'll lay it out for you so its easy to understand. You do have things to do today. Just like I had things to do the day I was crucified. Now take him to church and then to Manassas." That officially ended the conversation.
It finally comes out that we are going to church soon and he asks if he can go with us. I simply reply, "Sure and afterwards we can head up to Manassas."
We head to church where I secretly hope someone will see him and ask if they can do something. I am shocked and a little disappointed to find much of the church ignore the person we have brought. Then I begin to realize that they are also ignoring each other. They had gone to church but had no real desire to have fellowship with each other. Only the Pastor and a friend of mine chose to stop and talk with both myself and this man.
The three of us get back into my car and drive 20-30 min. north to Manassas. The whole time I grow more and more impatient with his talking and I begin to think again about how much time I will be wasting and not getting to spend with my friend. It becomes a struggle to stay focused on him and what he is talking about despite the fact that he is pouring out part of his life story. We finally get to Manassas and we get him situated and we leave. It was a relief at first to be done with this task, but we are then both filled with awe at what had just taken place. It is amazing that an event that lasted 4-5 hours can affect me so greatly and that despite knowing him only a brief time, this man, David Owen Johnson, will have forever impacted my life.
The question of course catches me off guard but I've come to expect this from him and so I sit and think about it for a while. I begin thinking about what the problems of my generation seem to revolve around and I answer, "Apathy. It is the one thing that keeps us from action and even caring about the hurts and pains of others. Love becomes trivialized because of it and it changes us completely from what God intended us to be."
He nods his head and we talk for a little while longer about it. As we're speaking I see a man with a long scraggly beard and a baseball cap. Other than noticing him, nothing else registers. Fifteen minutes later I see him walk out of the Chick-Fil-A with several bags around him made of old shirts. He was a homeless man and I didn't even care enough to realize it. I beat myself up about it quite a bit the rest of the day and even the following day I had a conversation about it discussing my own hypocrisy with another good friend. This time as I'm talking with her, she points behind me and standing just a few short feet behind is the same man from the day before. I turn around, smile, then get up and walk over to him having absolutely no idea what I'm doing. I say to him "Would you like to have breakfast with us and can I get you anything?"
He humbly replies, "Sure let me set this stuff down."
We walk up to the counter and the previously friendly cashier suddenly seems much more stern and almost irritable. I pay for his meal and we sit down to eat. We talk for a while about his plans and where he is headed. He tells us about his life and shares with us his past. He mentions that he is trying to get to Manassas just 20 miles north of where we are but trains don't run on Sundays or at least harder to get to as fewer people take them. I begin thinking and praying, "What is it that you'd like me to do Lord?"
"Take him to church with you."
"I can't really do that God. Maybe I can give him a couple bucks and pray for him."
"Take him to church then take him to Manassas."
"No, no you're not listening God, I can't do that. I only have a little time to Spend with my friend here and I don't want to waste it."
"Alright, Ryan I'll lay it out for you so its easy to understand. You do have things to do today. Just like I had things to do the day I was crucified. Now take him to church and then to Manassas." That officially ended the conversation.
It finally comes out that we are going to church soon and he asks if he can go with us. I simply reply, "Sure and afterwards we can head up to Manassas."
We head to church where I secretly hope someone will see him and ask if they can do something. I am shocked and a little disappointed to find much of the church ignore the person we have brought. Then I begin to realize that they are also ignoring each other. They had gone to church but had no real desire to have fellowship with each other. Only the Pastor and a friend of mine chose to stop and talk with both myself and this man.
The three of us get back into my car and drive 20-30 min. north to Manassas. The whole time I grow more and more impatient with his talking and I begin to think again about how much time I will be wasting and not getting to spend with my friend. It becomes a struggle to stay focused on him and what he is talking about despite the fact that he is pouring out part of his life story. We finally get to Manassas and we get him situated and we leave. It was a relief at first to be done with this task, but we are then both filled with awe at what had just taken place. It is amazing that an event that lasted 4-5 hours can affect me so greatly and that despite knowing him only a brief time, this man, David Owen Johnson, will have forever impacted my life.
Ridiculous Love
Watching as a young boy curls up in his father's arms I'm suddenly struck by a facet of God that while understood is very poorly grasped. In this image here of the father and the son there is something else going on below the surface. The son shows an intimate trust of his father and the father shows this uncompromising, unfailing, ridiculous love. It is fascinating and phenomenal to think that we can care more about a small individual than ourselves. So many times we hear of stories that parents have risked or given their lives for their children. It is simply unfathomable. To be so incredibly in love that you would literally do anything for them. Then we see God and His Love. We by our very nature are prone to failure, we can't always be loving or caring. There are times when we do fail at loving others even our own family, but God doesn't. He is so drunk with love that He sent His son who was also part of Him to die for us. He had such a ridiculous love that He gave His life for us.
Its a simple fact to grasp, God loved us so He died for us, but how incredible is that love. He is the God of everything. He created the Heavens and the Earth. He told the galaxies how to work, He governs the universe and His love caused Him to choose torture and pain even when the very ones He was saving, spit upon Him. How hard is it for us to trust someone after we've been hurt. Romantically speaking it is incredibly difficult. You fall in love and then your heart is broken, you feel depressed and know you can't feel that way again. God has had His heart broken time and time again but He recklessly goes back for more. He is driven by this all-encompassing ridiculous Love that just won't let go. Its so incredible that no matter how much we think we understand about it, we still haven't scratched the surface. That is the kind of Love that I think everyone desires to have and at the same time trembles at the thought of it. A ridiculous, reckless, uncompromising, irrational kind of Love.
Its a simple fact to grasp, God loved us so He died for us, but how incredible is that love. He is the God of everything. He created the Heavens and the Earth. He told the galaxies how to work, He governs the universe and His love caused Him to choose torture and pain even when the very ones He was saving, spit upon Him. How hard is it for us to trust someone after we've been hurt. Romantically speaking it is incredibly difficult. You fall in love and then your heart is broken, you feel depressed and know you can't feel that way again. God has had His heart broken time and time again but He recklessly goes back for more. He is driven by this all-encompassing ridiculous Love that just won't let go. Its so incredible that no matter how much we think we understand about it, we still haven't scratched the surface. That is the kind of Love that I think everyone desires to have and at the same time trembles at the thought of it. A ridiculous, reckless, uncompromising, irrational kind of Love.
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